roses are black violets are gray im color blind

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

did you ever see a butter fly?

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

Well, this is fun.

A black person in the NHL

What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

chuck norris is a little b|tch

Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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