Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Child Prostitution.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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