Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

Potato salad

Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

Rick Perry.

Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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