How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

Child Prostitution.

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

knock knock you may come in

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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