Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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