A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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Your mom.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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