There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

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What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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Q. Why did the teacher trip and fall? A. Because his left foot was gnawed off by a camel, and he often finds it difficult to walk.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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