A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse stares eats an apple and trots out... Horses can't speak therefore do not understand the question and cannot reply

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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I have a really funny joke.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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