Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

Happy Monday!

Knock, knock. Who's there? ...

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

Sarah Palin.

Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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