- Anti Joke

why dont they make black forks

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

what is orange red and blue, has wheels , and can talk? i don't know that's why i asked you

How many TV shows are there? A lot.

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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