A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

Stand back, I don't want to hit anyone with the axe.

Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

Heyy everyone text this number 320-510-3277 Kay ask him why he poops the bed at age 17 .. His name is mike geier.. Haha

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

A man visits an anti joke site looking for some humor. realizing that its not funny, he closes the window.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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