what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

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How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

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A child walks into a bar. He finds to find his dad passed out in his vomit, the bartender realizes the dad left the kid in the car, and he is arrested. The kid grows up traumatized by the experience, and becomes a substance abuser just like his dad.

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There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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