How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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