What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

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What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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What do you call a fat kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

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What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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