Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

meatspin.fr

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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