Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

Did you know diarrhoea is genetic? It is a side effect of Polycystic Kidney Disease.

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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