- Anti Joke

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Death by kayak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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