What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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you will like this because i am black.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops