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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops