What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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