Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops