A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

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What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

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God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Fat? Jesse Z

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Q: What do you call a dear with no eyes A: Nothing - call an animal cruelty service

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops