A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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Diarrhea

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

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A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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