a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Knock Knock Who's there

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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69

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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