Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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