Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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