Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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A young baby died.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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