What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

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A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Knock knock Whose there? 4

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops