Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

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What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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