A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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why did the blond have a broken nose? because she was brutaly beaten by five rapists when she refused to have sex with them.

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Why does the party start when Kesha walks in? Well, it's Kesha's party and it would be rude to be in her house having a party when she wasn't there.

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How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

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Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have multi-personality disorder. Patient: Which one of us?

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if you have hair on the palm of your hand you might want to get that checked out

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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Why was the black boy late for school? He missed the bus

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

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what did jacob say to coach a joke

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead

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Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops