How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

What colour is a black man in a freezer black

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

your mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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