Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

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If your reading this, youre not blind.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops