Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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You just read this ..

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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what do jason kidd and michael jackson have in common? they are both actually black

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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Pickles

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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Whats grosser then gross? A dead puppy in a barrel. Whats grosser the a dead puppy in a barrel? A dead puppy in two barrels. Created by : go josh or ty :D

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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