- Anti Joke

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

dead dibbs

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

black people swimming

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

dallen loves penis

Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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