Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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69.

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Nathan likes butt games with African American men

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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