- Anti Joke

A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

"How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door." "How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door." "The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which one?" "The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator." "There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat." "You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting."

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Hello, I am Sergent Henry Orange. I'm afraid your husband was shot down by an enemy aircraft. I'm sorry, he was a brave man.

Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

Robin, get in the car, please.

If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

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10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

a man walks into a bar and a horsefly eats him

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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