Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops