knock knock you may come in

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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What's 9 +10 19

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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did you ever see a butter fly?

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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did you hear about the sidewalk? its all over town.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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American healthcare.

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops