What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops