How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops