How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

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Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

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A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

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There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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