How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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what is 3+3= 8

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops