Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

A Chinese man fails a math test

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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