Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

A: Knock knock B:The door is open.

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

The Ohio State Buckeyes

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

what came first the chicken or the chips

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

roses are red violets should be purple

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? I don't know, dinosaurs have been extinct for 200 million years.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

I walk into a bar...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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