Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

A car walks into a bar.

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 6's boss, has been sexually assaulting 6 for years at work, but 6 needs the money too bad to say anything or quit his job.

Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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