i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's brown and sticky? My ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops