How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

DON’T HIT KIDS!!! NO, SERIOUSLY, THEY HAVE GUNS NOW. Via: Pingzic collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

Obama Getting Re-Elected.

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

wut du u cull a niggre whos wyte nut a niggre

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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