what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

On the 1st day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . Windows 95 for my PC On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 3rd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 7th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 8th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 9 apps a crashin' 8 megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 12 illegal operations 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -14

IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down -14

1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops