What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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What's the different between a white guy and a black guy? The white guy makes his money, and the black guy steels the white guys money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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