Knock Knock Who's There Me

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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Democracy.

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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