What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops