What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

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We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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