After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Pain Olympics.

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Every time a bell rings an angel gets it's wings. What they don't tell you is every time a mouse trap snaps an angel gets set on fire.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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