Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

Knock Knock? Come in.

Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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