Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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