Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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what are you your not a human? are you an other?

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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