Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Denard Robinson

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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