What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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