Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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if you don't like this you're gay

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

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A man walks into a bar

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what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops