How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

What's one plus one? two.

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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