- Anti Joke

Knock knock Nobody's home.

American healthcare.

Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

what happened to the man who ran straight into a brick wall he bounced off it, fell back, stumbled. he lifted his head up, looked at it, put his arm to his head. got up, groaned, dusted himself down, and walked towards the pub.

Religion

Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

That's unfortunate.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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