What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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87

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Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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1+1= 69

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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