Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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Obama

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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Brett Farve

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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