Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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Hey Patrick Yea? I found something funnier then 24 Give to me buddy 25

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Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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I got shot, you laughed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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