A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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