There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

son, you're adopted.

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

1+1= 69

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

Oh...okay, good.

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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