why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

the cow goes moo

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

why did the chicken cross the road

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

Women's rights

Brett Farve

Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

I got shot, you laughed

Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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