Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

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What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Q:What did the Hulk say before the bartender refused to serve him further drinks? A: HULK SMASHED! Moral: "THE MORE DRUNK THE HULK GETS! BLURRIER HIS VISION BECOMES! HULK IS THE BLURRIEST THERE IS!"

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All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

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Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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