A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

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what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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