What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

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#IHateHashtags

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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