What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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Why did the chicken cross the road Cause he wanted to

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

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A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops