What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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