What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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I'm homeless.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Amanda Knox walks home free.

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A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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What does the thirsty butcher drink? Chocolate milk. Because he can.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy? They have different colors of skin.

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Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops