What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Tunechi

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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