A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

My love life

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

Lewis

A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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