Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Why did I the granda fall out of her wheel chair?. She fell down the steps

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's me. Oh, come on in. Thanks.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops