How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

The Labour Party.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here I don't get it

Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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