If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats funny? Your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats 7+4? 74

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

thumb_up thumb_down -32

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops