Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Fat? Jesse Z

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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13 =B you just learned something

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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