What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Why did the Muslim man get on a plane? Because he was going on vacation

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Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops