Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

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So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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