What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

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what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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What is a white man in a white shirt called A white man in a white shirt

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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hashtags suck balls

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What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

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what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

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I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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why is king kong so fat? because he eats to mucj

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Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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