What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

Why is there a corpse in this TV box? Bob was never a great skydiver.

Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

how much fish could a chicken

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

someone called someone else a frog

when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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