Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops