What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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it was all Tagart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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