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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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