roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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Why didn't the black man understand an anti-joke? Because like any other member of the human race, he expected a typical joke structure to occur, starting with a misleading introduction which then using surrealism or misguidance trails into a humorous punchline.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops