jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

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roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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