What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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Yesterday, I was assasinated.

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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