Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Neither have I

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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