Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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Lololol

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my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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