Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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