What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops