Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

Knock knock... Home invasion

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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