Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

69

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

9/11 my birthday

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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