3 women are on a plane. One blonde, one brunnete, and the other a red head. The pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. The 3 women find out that there is only one parachute in the plane. The plane crashes and they all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops