I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

A muslim walks out of a plane.

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

A dancer walks into a barre

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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