Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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pobody's nerfect

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there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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