What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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why did your mom make food to feed the killweeds.

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops