- Anti Joke

Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

knock knock? come in

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

what's funny about war? nothing!

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.