How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

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Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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