roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Kyle grund parker coffey

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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