Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

Knock knock It's open, come in

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

who is smarter than a human? a nerd

My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

Diarrhea

Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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