A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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ask me if i am a tree. no.

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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