What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Jack Stevens

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not?

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops