A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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Women's rights.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops