There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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69.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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