Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

Wanna hear a joke? no

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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