What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

What kind of coffee did they drink on the Titanic? They didn't. They all died.

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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