A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says that there are no dogs allowed, but the man says that he is blind. So the man sits down with his dog and asks for a drink. The bartender decided to check to see if he was really blind, so he says, " Hey, do you know what time it is?" The blind man replies, "7 o'clock," The bartender says, "Ha! You said you were blind! Get out of..." but was interrupted by the man, who promptly said, "No, I'm deaf," and left.

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How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist bastard..

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

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Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

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What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

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A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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