What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops