Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops