What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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