What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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