Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops