A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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