Why didn't the puppy play with his toys? They were poisonous.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Homo say what?

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

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whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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What's big and purple? Barney

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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Maths.

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What is stupid and looks like you? You.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops