Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

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What did Hellen Keller say to her baby cousin? Nothing

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Rape and child abuse.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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The rabbit owns a small business and has trouble getting a loan.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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A bold man said "well, here goes nothing!" Moments later, thats what happened

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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What do you call man who travels on foot? a pedestrian

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops