Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Donald Trump.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops