How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

knock knock whos there open open who the door

Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

yo mama so ugly she made a happy meal frown.

why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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