So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

Women deserve equal rights.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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