Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Women's rights

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Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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What do you call a tree on fire? A burning tree.

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What is the difference between Jews and the boyscouts? The boyscouts come home from camp.

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Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

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Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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The jets are a good team..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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