Humans are pathetic: What kind of heaven is it when you die, and learn that everybody you love chose the wrong religion and is burning in hell? Moral: Human garbage!

What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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