Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

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He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

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Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

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Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops