There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops