I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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