Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops