The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

Two straight men walk into a gay bar. They quickly realize their mistake and cross the street to the tavern where they enjoy a beer and some pretzels.

What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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