An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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i saw amango it splootered

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My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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Go away still nothing to see

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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Why don't bats have penises? They do. I tried. Menstruation.

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Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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