- Anti Joke

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" dies

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

Cripples are lame.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" dies

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

Cripples are lame.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" dies