The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops