Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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matt is fat

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

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Two trees sit in a dark forest. Between them is a small hare. The wind blows hard and rustles the trees. The hare then looks up, and then forward. He hops away.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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