i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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