What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

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What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

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What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops