A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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GOODBYE

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a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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