What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

Why did Alec cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by an axe.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, it hurts when i poke my leg like this!" The doctor says,"Mm yes, it seems you have taken an arrow to the knee. You'll never walk again."

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

Massie is a fatass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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