whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the cat in the bag? Because it's owner was abusive and put it in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -11

i have two hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is not funny Bad jokes!????

thumb_up thumb_down -11

One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops