What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...