Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why did the asbestos cross the road? Because it was being removed from an elementary school due to the fact that asbestos is an air pollutant which is regulated under section 112 of the Clean Air Act of 1970.

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Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

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Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

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What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops