What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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