what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Rim Ram Ree, Kick him in the knee, Rim Ram Rass, Kick him in the other knee

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

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A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Q: Why couldn' the muslim eat pork? A: Because he had been raped and killed by a giant scorpion.

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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Knock Knock Who's there? Immigration. You're headed back to mexico.

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A gay man watches football.

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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