Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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knock knock come in !

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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Whats cold and frozen? ice

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

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Jokes=Funny Anti=Opposite Anti+Joke=Anti Joke Anti Joke= Anti Humour Anti Humour + People= Offensive Jokes Offensive Jokes= Often jokes about women Offensive Jokes=Problems Women=Problems

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How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops