why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Q: What do you call a nun in a wheelchair A: Handicapped.

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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My cat just died.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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