An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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u know whats a crime? rape

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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what did the white guy say to the black guy? nothing because hes racist and hates blacks people

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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