Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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