What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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