Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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