A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops