What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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everyone dislike the first joke on page one

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i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

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A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

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Did you hear about the german girl who had sex and died................. it was 50 years later after she had a family of about five kids and lived a happy life as a nurse

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You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

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A christian and an atheist are in a bar. The christian says "if you don't accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior you will go to hell." The atheist replies "No I won't."

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I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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My jeans

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What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

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can you touch your toes? no

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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