What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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