Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

You: That was awful. Me: You know what else is awful? You: What? Me: This joke.

A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

Why did the most interesting man in the world refuse to eat his buttered toast? It just so happens that the cook accidentally used stale bread, causing it to taste unsatisfactory.

what do you do when you see the klu klucks klan ? act white

Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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