how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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A dyslexic blind man

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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A Christian walks into a bar . . . mitzvah.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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