whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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like if your cool

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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