Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Why does Rupert the Bear wear chequered trousers? Because that's how the creator originally drew him.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops