What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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what are you your not a human? are you an other?

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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wut du u cull a niggre whos wyte nut a niggre

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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