How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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why is king kong so fat? because he eats to mucj

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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knock knock who's there? I'm here.

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops