Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

star wars kid

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Steve Jobs is alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What has two legs? Half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the blond fall down? She died.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops