Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

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Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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95556

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Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

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WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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