Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

your brother so fine that hes skinney

Nathan likes butt games with African American men

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

What's better than a stick? A stone

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

Obama lin Baden.

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

my egg roll

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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