What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

don't just stand there

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Who wants water? I do.

why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

knock knock come in

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...