Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

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A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

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YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

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Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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yo mamma so fat when she seen a stop sigh she ate it

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What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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SEX

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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How do you make a mime talk? Put a gun to his head.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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HALF LIFE 4 COMING OUT SOON!

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What did the snake say to the rat?

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GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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