Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

women's rights.

If the joke below mine says something about a mom its from adam he sucks ...

What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

What do you call a gay man in a wheelchair? Nothing, his life is already hard enough and bullying him will only make the problem worse.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

A man walks into a bar. The initial impact knocks him violently to the ground, where he lies gasping in agony. Flustered and in a state of psychological shock, he shakily reaches up and touches his head in an attempt to asses the damage he has sustained and establish the seriousness of the situation. He lets out a resigned whimper when he realises his hands are stained a deep red. More blood gushes in torrents from his left temple, and the man chokes on his vomit as he writhes on the ground uncontrollably, incessant waves of pain washing over him. The protruding metal bar left so carelessly in his path has done a lot more damage than the man is aware of. His skull has been shattered in several places and he has suffered additional fractures to his cheek bone and jaw. Also, the sheer force at which the man has collided with the bar means that he is severely concussed and the onset of brain haemorrhage is becoming very likely. Brain haemorrhage is a very common cause of strokes and, if left untreated, the bleed will almost certainly kill the man in later life. However, the chances of the man reaching this stage in his life are now almost non-existent. He is losing copious volumes of blood from the wounds sustained to his face, and is becoming weaker by the second. He needs a blood transfusion immediately if he is to live. But nobody is there to go to his aid. The harsh reality is, he is doomed...

q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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