Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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star wars kid

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops