Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

A bar walks into a man

How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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