what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

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You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

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My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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