When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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all these jokes are horrible now

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

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A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

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There are two kids playing basketball outside one kid shoots and makes it. The other youngster exclaims "nice shot!" because the other boy put the ball in the hoop from a very long distance.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

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People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops