Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

What do you call a black person born in America? American.

some people say that i am gay they are right cause i like boys

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

Yanter, Look it up

what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

Why did Alec cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by an axe.

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

What's worse than The Holocaust? CREED...

Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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