A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

what happened when joey asked the teacher to go to the restroom? The Teacher said "yes you may go to the restroom," not even putting into consideration that joey was a ginger and discriminating him because of it.

what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

What does two plus two equal? 4

why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

Your mom is so old she died

why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

I had friends on the Death Star.

Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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